Bear with me today as I explore a step beyond where I am today, a step that will surely come, and that I feel the need to prepare for.

I have two sweet daughters. I will never say anything different. Presently, everyone in my vortex knows that Emily is no longer living on earth, but a time will come when I will meet new people, and the yet unspoken will linger in the air. “How many children do you have?” And I’ll pause, perhaps tear up, and will have no choice but to answer that I have two. But what then? For strangers, I don’t owe an explanation, but for those verging on friendship, those I feel a tug toward, I shall have to add on to that simple sentence. 

One on earth; one in heaven. I’ve heard that said. I’m not sure it fits for me. Might Emily be an angel? I believe she is, not in the sense that she has wings and a halo, but that she is a sort of pure positive energy that is indeed watching over us, her chosen family, as well as all those she loved, including her friends, who miss her so.

One on earth; one an angel. I rather like it. Charlotte and Don will find their own nomenclature to explain the loss of this beloved sister and daughter. But for now, I believe this works for me. Until I find a better way to express the depth of this concept, this will be what I have in my back pocket, when I am caught by surprise and wish to share.

How quickly I came to this conclusion! You’ve not needed to go on a serpentine expedition with me after all. As I allowed myself to think about this that has been hovering and I’ve not allowed space for until now, it simply came to me. As I breathe and allow ease and flow, I receive the answers I need in the moment.


I will always honour my Emily. I will always and ever have two daughters. 


Here’s an update: I just received an AHA suggestion from my friend, Amanda: one on earth and one in my heart. I truly love this. Now I will have two ways to share both my Charlotte and my Emily.


8 thoughts on “I Have Two Daughters”

  1. You are experiencing the supernatural in a surreal, but blessed and loving way. Emily IS with you, event though we can't understand that truth. But, as her mom, you sense her and are holding her in your heart and this is what's happening. You and Emily: two souls united. With all the joy and laughter and popcorn that goes along with moms and their precious children. xx (SJ)

  2. My version of my message:
    As usual, grave and positive alonside, touching as only you can write.

    And some distractions
    ===============
    An AI suggestions :::::::::::::
    As usual, there's a mixture of sadness and optimism, as touching as only you can write.

    As usual, there's both sadness and positivity, as touching as only you can write.

    As usual, the content is both grave and positive, and the writing is touching as only you can write.

    As usual, you write with a combination of grave and positive tone, and it's as touching as you can write.

    As usual, a mix of grave and positive emotions, as touching as you can write.

    As usual, there's a mix of sadness and positivity, with a touch of depth that only you can write about
    ========================= AI end

    I don't know what will happen with langages when AI compose better than 90% of us. It means that we will all write better with a little help from our new friend AI.

    Michel G.

  3. I love how you are leaving space for Don and Charlotte to adjust to this new reality. At the same time, you are infusing that space with a mama's love. Nothing can or should replace that. (SJ)

  4. Thank you for this. Yes I have two daughters one that doesn't talk to me and hasn't for nearly 20 years and one that's in heaven are in my heart. I also have five Sons, for near me and one in heaven and in my heart. I'm going to think of it that way from now on. People love and ask how I handle the loss of a daughter and a son and I tell them that I keep them in my heart they're always there. I am so sorry for your loss

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